Updates and Upgrades
Moving along, slowly and steadily
This Substack is about life in Việt Nam from the viewpoint of a 11-year expat who spent his first 60 years in a low-context culture.
Despite the virtual omnipresence of AI “writings”, this Substack will never use them. Everything published here uses only, unless otherwise noted, my original thoughts and words.
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This is post number 101!
To see a list by topic of my 100 previous posts, click here.
I’m VERY Proud of H
H graduated from Level 9 last Sunday and is very happy to have the year, and this school, in her rear view. Before this school, she was always a good student and her peers flocked to her, all wanting to be her friend. This year, she got in with “the wrong crowd” and, for a while, became a follower of her class’s Svengali. It was bad for a while. Fortunately, her mom and I were (we hope) able to get through and help her understand that this girl was NOT her friend — she was using H to get what she wanted.
In the end, literally in the last weeks of the school year, she rallied — close to her final exams that determine whether or not she’ll go to the “good” high school1. Like many kids who are spoiled — by spoiled, I mean she never wants for food, clothing, a warm bed, a bit of spending money in exchange for doing a few chores, and other things most of her peers don’t have — she can be a brat. Since she’s 14, that’s also pretty much a given.
H currently has an iPhone 15 Pro that she paid for herself by making monthly payments2 to me over 24 months. She used Tết and birthday gift money and her allowance; never missed a payment, and was never late.
Now she wants a 17 Pro Max, even though she can’t tell me what it will do that her 15 Pro won’t. A few weeks ago, in the interest of increasing motivation to max out her final marks, I promised her that if she placed high enough in her class to gain admission to the good high school, I would buy her a silver iPhone 17 Pro Max3. She immediately went from where she goes next year is “no big deal” to pumped to attend the good school, which was what we wanted.
Yes, I know.
The thing about Việt Nam’s public education system is that the high school you go to is a HUGE factor in your university options. Sort of like graduating from Yale with a 3.0 GPA will get you more job offers than graduating “Overshoe U” with 4.0 GPA. I asked her mom to whom we had to offer coffee money to get her in (yes, I know), and was told that the coffee money thing only works through Level 5. I paid it from Levels 1 through 5 to ensure she got the best teacher at her level and I’d do it again. Although I already knew (because I tried) it didn’t work for 6-9, I thought maybe whomever finalizes the list might be reachable because coffee money works throughout the country at almost every level.
“Who you know” is a thing in the first world. In developing countries, who you know is still important, though often less of a factor than “how much are you willing to part with?”.
Is it wrong? Where you live, the answer is most likely, “yes”. Here, it’s the culture. Certain people keep suggesting that I assimilate more, so there it is.
It’s been a week since her graduation and I thought we’d know by now which high school she’s heading to. We don’t.
Split toe
Pardon me if I’ve already told you about this… I vaguely remember writing it, but can’t find it, so here goes.
In January, when I was in for the implantation surgery4, Karli and I discussed the options I wanted on my prosthetic leg. The one I was absolutely adamant about was that the foot be split between the great toe and the index, or second, toe. I told her that I wear slippers (a.k.a sandals or thongs5) 95% of the time, including every minute I’m inside the house or a hotel room, so the split was non-negotiable. She said it was a special order. I replied, “Please order it.” She did, and it’s great.
It could go a couple millimeters deeper, though since it’s still under warranty, I can’t/won’t cut it.
Pathetic Prosthetic Progress
Say that quickly three times…
Some of you are wondering how I’m doing adapting to my prosthesis…
Slowly. Much slower than I would like.
About two weeks ago, my hip started hurting — like something’s wrong with the bones. Damn! Last Tuesday, I plugged my leg in to charge overnight and I haven’t worn it since because the pain is unbearable after only a few steps with the cane. Without the cane, I can’t walk at all.
Until Tuesday, I walked without the cane for a few minutes each day, usually until the pain in my hip got to be too much. Since I have 24/7 pain that’s about minimum of 5/10, it didn’t take long to get there.
I’ve already tried deep-tissue massage, and it didn’t really help. As soon as I can get a recommendation for a good acupuncturist, I’ll give that a shot.
This coming Friday, I will see Dr. Phat in Saigon and see if he can tell me what the hell’s going on. If not, or if it calls for surgery, I’ll go to the local orthopedic hospital, Cho Ray, for a second opinion. After that, it may be that I have to head back to see Dr. Al Muderis in West Palm.
Damn!
My out-of-pocket just for the leg was over US$13,000 and there’s no way I’m giving up on it, especially since I’ve had it less than two months. I really liked it — until the pain level went through the flippin’ roof.
Trike Upgrades
Before I went to Saigon a couple weeks ago, I shipped my trike down to a custom fabricator. He worked on every “big bike” I had over the years, so I messaged him (his English is a little less than my tiếng Việt), described the trike, and told him I was unhappy with the suspension and the lack of power going up Đà Lạt’s hills. He said, in short, that he could hook me up.
He did! Shocks from a Honda SH300 make a big difference in the ride, and a new gear increased the low-end torque, so the hills of Đà Lạt are much less of a challenge.
I’m very happy.
He also had a supplier strip the chrome off the fenders and exhaust cover and powder-coated them black. I like them much better this way.
Finally, he re-shaped the arm saddle on one of my crutches; bent flat when I missed a step down coming out of the dentist and landed on it.
Small victories.
Lazada delivered a couple auxiliary LED tail/brake lights on Thursday.
I hope to install them on top of the rear fenders this week to make me a bit more visible. I’m also thinking about installing a stronger HORN.
It’s still challenging to complete previously simple tasks like installing these lights. I take the leg off before starting, ‘cause it slows me down6. Then I’d hop around and almost fall six times ‘cause I used my walker to get down to the garage, when I should have used my crutches.
There are so many things that a year ago were no-brainers and now take some advance consideration. I’m getting there, it’s just going to take some time.
Language Update
A little more than two years ago, I wrote my first expat-content post,
It was mostly about tones and how unless you get them exactly right, many/most natives won’t understand you. Then, two months later, I revisited the topic here.
The other morning, I felt a bit lazy and was lying in bed, doomscrolling on Instagram for the first time in a long while. I “liked” a couple Vietnamese language posts and followed their creator’s stuff. Yes, I’m pretty sure I am using the wrong terms and I hope I never spend enough time on the platform to learn the correct ones. I found this short video that makes my points of the posts linked to above. I can’t figure out how to make the image below clickable, so
Now do you understand why I’ve been here 11 years and still, as some of my acquaintances say, “talk like a baby” because I may know the word’s letters, but rarely can I say the tones correctly?
“War! What is it good for? Absolutely NOTHING!”
Living in Việt Nam, one eventually refers to the U.S. military’s disastrous time here from 1965 through sometime in 1973, as “The American War”. In the U.S. and pretty much everywhere outside of Việt Nam, it’s known as “The Vietnam War”. If you think about it, every war here was a “Việt Nam War”.
As bad as things are in the U.S. right now, especially financially, there is still a portion of the U.S. public that has the time and inclination to pay attention to things other than their own day-to-day survival. For a while now, I’ve thought some of them would think differently about its country’s virtually non-stop murder of non-combatants around the world via its many wars, both declared and undeclared, if these wars were called what they actually are/were.
For example, “The American War in Vietnam”, “The American War in Korea”, “The American War in Iraq”, and so on. As I typed the previous sentence, it occurred to me that “The American War on Iran” and so on is more accurate and would be even better at getting the public behind peace.
“Donald Trump’s War on Iran” should still be called this, though, because it’s what it is.
Or we could go with “Needy Amin’s War on Iran”…
Back to the American War in Việt Nam for a moment. If you have any doubts as to the fact that there were hundreds of My Lai-type massacres in those eight horrible years, read Nick Turse’s Kill Anything That Moves. It’s the product of unbelievably deep research, including DOD files and interviews of Vietnamese people and U.S. veterans.
It will turn your stomach. Guaranteed. I could only read one chapter per sitting, so it took me months to finish it.
War is stupid. Let’s end the current ones and never start another. How? Start by finding candidates for all national offices who have empathy AND common sense.
I’ve no idea who first said this:
The problem with common sense is that it’s not very.
Spot on.
Stop voting for the lesser of evils. Start voting for people with a heart.
Like James Talarico, if you’re in Texas.
Imagine where we’d be today if the Wasserman Schulz and the DNC Machine hadn’t taken out Bernie.
Speaking of Heartless, Stoopid, Cruel, and Criminal
JoJoFromJerz nailed it. Again:
Hell, Lyndon Johnson called this scam out sixty years ago. He told his aide Bill Moyers exactly how it works: “If you can convince the lowest white man he’s better than the best colored man, he won’t notice you’re picking his pocket. Hell, give him somebody to look down on, and he’ll empty his pockets for you.”
Donald Trump didn’t invent this con. He just added a goddamn gift shop.
{snip}
And somehow he also convinced millions of you he was one of you.
It’s one of the most spectacular bait-and-switch scams this country has ever swallowed whole because now your life keeps getting harder while your chemically preserved culture-war concierge is out there redecorating the White House like Liberace’s former costumer got blackout drunk on peach schnapps and QVC inside a velvet-wall brothel somewhere off the Jersey Turnpike.
Read JoJo’s stuff. She can turn a phrase like no one else I’ve read, and I read a LOT.
Choose peace.
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Here, the “good” school means the best one. They pull from all the middle schools in the city. Who makes the cut Is decided “on the curve” and depends on how many slots are open.
She also paid for her iPhone 12 that she traded in on the 15 using Daddy as a lien holder. Through these two purchases, she’s learned to plan ahead and be financially responsible — things her mother could never teach her. Three guesses why…
It costs more than any of her blood relatives to once removed has ever earned in a month.
Implantation of the rod to connect to the leg into the femur
NOT butt floss; the thongs for feet
Probably in large part because the ankle doesn’t bend, so any movements other than walking are more difficult
Fourteen. Yes. Coffee money and i-phones -- you do what works. And <pray> : )